Our relationships have a profound impact on us. If they’re healthy, they will strengthen and benefit us; if they’re toxic, however, they can break us down and weaken us. When we’re forming friendships, it’s important to surround ourselves with the right people. Cultivating positive relationships is not only good for our emotional well-being, it’s also God’s will for us.

The friends we spend time with can influence us, for good or bad. Those we expose ourselves to influence how we think; how we think determines how we feel; and how we feel determines our decisions. Our decisions determine our actions; our actions determine our habits; and our habits control our character. “Do not be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character’” (1 Corinthians 15:33, NIV).

We may have seen people with good morals who fall in with the wrong crowd ultimately make bad decisions and do things out of character for them. Perhaps it’s even happened to us. Sometimes those whom we call friends aren’t really our friends at all. “There are ‘friends’ who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother” (Proverbs 18:24, NLT). Thankfully for us, when we ask God for help in this area, He works through others to rescue us out of a bad situation.

When we’ve been associating with individuals who don’t have our best interest at heart, God can put people in our path who genuinely care about us. Self-centered, insecure people are likely to abandon us in tough times. Godly friends strengthen us by rallying around us when we need help, and they’ll stick by us no matter what. They tell us the truth in love, and keep us honest and morally upright. “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17, NIV).

The type of relationships that God wants for us benefit everyone involved. True friends think of others before themselves; they’re always ready to encourage us when we’re weak. “Therefore encourage (admonish, exhort) one another and edify (strengthen and build up) one another, just as you are doing” (1 Thessalonians 5:11, AMPC). God uses them to bless us and show us how much He loves us.

It’s good for our mental health to spend time with people who point out our good qualities instead of our flaws, who enjoy our company and accept us just as we are. They’ve seen us at our worst, and still call us friends. They confide in us, and hold our personal secrets in confidence when we confide in them. They bring the type of joy that keeps us strong into our lives. “…Neither be ye sorry; for the joy of the LORD is your strength” (Nehemiah 8:10).

The kind of people God has in mind for us don’t want to see us get hurt. They take no joy in our mistakes. When we fall in life, they pick us up and help us get moving forward again. “Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up” (Ecclesiastes 4:9, 10).

We’re free moral agents, and we can choose for ourselves the kind of people we make friends with. God’s intercession in this area is entirely up to us. Relying on Him to help us forge healthy relationships always results in the right decision.